Roy King LIVE!
by Chillay
Summary: Interview with a few of the monsters from Diablo 2. A few misunderstood secrets revealed.


Roy King LIVE!  
  
Words from the author: This little talk show will show you what REALLY happened in the eyes of the enemy.  
  
Roy: Well hello folks of the Diablo 2 realms ,to my interest, I've gotten a few of the monsters of D2 to appear here today.  
  
*audience gasps! *  
  
Roy: Yes yes, I know, how'd I do it? I 'promised' to the three brothers that if they stare here with other monsters then I would give them them full-  
  
*Sign above flashes 'Off topic idiot'*  
  
Roy:Oops! Eh heh, lets all welcome Mephisto!  
  
*audience claps *  
  
A satanic red portal appears, Mephisto passes through  
  
Roy: Please make yourself like at home, Lord of Putrid your highness.  
  
Mephisto:Yes yes, tha- wait a minute, I am the Lord of HATRED, how dare you mortal call me the Lord of Putrid!  
  
Roy: Well that's one conclusion, hes slow here *gestures to his head*  
  
Roy: Anyways, I and a few others have been notified that you weren't the real enemy in that conflict with you and the hero that slayed you.  
  
Mephisto: Absolutely, I was NOT the enemy. You see it was Halloween when it all happened. I thought of opening a party for my FAVORITE occasion, and it'd be right in my Durance of Hate. Think of that. Anyways a few of my buddy council members would be outside by the neighbourhood of Travincal handing out Compelling Orb candies to those trick-or-treaters. A group of stern and serious humans showed up, causing a big wreck wherever they went, believe me, I got word that the group jumped a few of those Hierophants that were only putting on lightshows advertising my Durance of Hate haunted house. Anyways, my council members ran out of Compelling Orb candies, so they asked if the group would trick them in return, and boy was that a stupid thing to say. The group went furious and attacked my Council buddies, each one falling victim and becoming killed. I heard of this and instantly knew that they'd enter my homemade haunted house, the Durance of Hate. I immediately turned on slightly enhanced security. But sadly the group murdered all my special effects.the Stygian Dolls..that took me hours to possess, and those Dark Lords that took me hours to levitate. As they went on the last floor where I was partying with other council members and where we had a lava pool for a few hot swims. They stormed in and killed the party DJ, Bremm Sparkfist along with other friends. When they got down to me, it was a horrific sight, a few Amazons that shot freezing cold arrows at me, a few poking at me with those spears thinking I was chicabob, a few barbarians that was doing ballerina spins at me, and a sorceress that was barbequing me with her fiery breath, I tried to get a better look at who the other offenders were, but it was too late, I got melted to a goop. I was vaporized. Then they robbed me of my gold ,and I needed all that gold for that next flight to Hell.grrr.  
  
Roy: That was very touching, indeed. But word has it that you'v ebeen sneaking in some goods.a few uniques in your pockets eh.  
  
Mephisto: That's a lie! *starts to float towards the portal ,a Buriza drops out of him ,he scurries and picks it up *  
  
Audience: HEY! That's mine!* a mob approaches for it*  
  
Mephisto: Bwahahaha, come and try to get it! *jumps into the portal to Hell, as the mob of audiences rush in after him *  
  
Roy: Well remaining folks, next up we have the lord of Terror, Diablo coming here to talk with us.  
  
*Diablo climbs out of the fiery portal to hell. *  
  
Roy: Welcome Mr.D.  
  
Diablo: Ya, it's a treasure being here.  
  
Roy: You mean pleas-  
  
Diablo: You will NOT correct me mortal, for I am always right.  
  
Roy: ..Anyways, a few rumours have stirred up over the issue of you copying many aspects of the Necromancer, like your phrase you say before you get out of your seal. "Not even death can save you from me!" is the same as the necromancers.  
  
Diablo: Hahahahahahaha no, that phrase was never copied from those corpse whores.  
  
*A necromancer from the audience stands up * Nec: Is that so? Is that why you also used a necromancer's infamous skill, Bone prison to trap your enemies? Huh you plagerising scum *spits * And we have mastered the undead unlike you, Demon, die once and then scurry back to hell! Unlike you , we may resurrect ourselves! *Audience claps and whistles * Diablo: Why you.I don't copy any of the arts of your kind, I'd be copying the arts of a sorry-*censored* race! *Jump into the audience and onto the necromancer* Not even death can save you from me! *rips off the necromancer's head * Guess I'll use you as my new shrunken head shield. Hmph!  
  
Audience: You brutal fiend!! Lets jump'em.  
  
Diablo: Bring it *breathes his infernal sizzling breath around the audience, setting the chairs on fire and burns up the set *  
  
Roy: Well folks, we're currently going through some technical difficulties, nexttime we'll feature more of the mistaken foes and other enemies of D2.  
  
To be continued. 


End file.
